15 Weeks

9 and half weeks left as New Yorkers...

A few things:

• The 1st Trimester blahs might ACTUALLY, FOR REAL be fading into a thing of the past! I didn't feel nauseous the last two days (well except for 2 quick moments when some very, very, very disgusting smells graced my presence!) I might be speaking too soon, but even at that - 2 days of not feeling so foul is enough to celebrate!!! 

• I had my first dream about the baby. In my dream, I was stuck birthing with the midwives here in Brooklyn, but it got even worse. Their place was taken over by a doctor who was all about the interventions and told me all my ideas and expectations for the birthing experience and pregnancy were WRONG! My brain magically (maybe it could do this in real life) skipped the pain of birth and ta-da a baby was taken from me to a table to be examined and what not... As I got up to go see my new baby it turned out to be a baby boy the size of a 2 year old toddler. He didn't look anything like Seth or me, and I was certain the name we have picked out for a boy just didn't fit. I remember thinking to myself that I wish Seth were here so we could figure out what to name him! Skip ahead a little - the baby boy morphed into a bit more of a baby but he was So. Heavy. In my dream I kept dropping him on his head! Oy! When I told Seth about hte dream, he was happy to hear I was dreaming about a BOY though! 

• Today marks 15 weeks! I should start feeling the baby sometime in the next 5 weeks! Cannot wait! :) I wonder, at what point can others (Seth) feel the baby moving too? 

• Seth and I are moving out of New York in 9 and a half weeks. Seems a little crazy - especially because only 3 of the remaining weekends are free (the next 2 and one in June)... We have a lot of things to square away (get rid of) between now and then! 

• I cried on the subway this morning - many times. I haven't listened to music in a while (momentarily lost my headphones with all the coat switching this crazy weather has caused), but every song I listened to moved me to tears. (Jac - I now understand what you meant last spring when you told me about this happening to you!) Luckily people don't pay much attention on the subway... I still kept my head down most of the ride. :) 

• Ooo and happy news - I think I have a spot in the most wonderful midwifery and birthing center for our birth! I'll share more about the specifics of it closer to the birth but a few things I love - during a phone conversation with a midwife yesterday I was asked more questions than I have been in my current care and given very specific advice and suggestions with explanations. They offer expecting mom groups - which will be awesome for when we move since I only know one other mom there (Jac). AND this group turns into a new mom group that meets once a week AFTER the birth - a built in support group! They'll start my care from a distance - after I have my monthly appointment with my current midwives, I'll fax my papers to my new Portland midwife, and we'll have an appointment over the phone. This makes me feel so much better - I feel like starting something new when I'm six months along would be a little stressful for me. At least when I show up now, my midwife will already have a chart, and be familiar with my pregnancy. PLUS everyone I have spoken with from there is SOOO amazing and nice and helpful. It seems like the kind of place you'd want to just hangout at! (Portland overall seemed to have nicer people when we visited last August. I am looking forward to losing the hard New Yorker bit and being surrounded by nicer people.) 

Finding a Birthing Center

I think I might be kind of crazy to be moving across the country part way through my first pregnancy. At least I'm moving away from a place where I don't think I could find the care I really wanted during the birthing to a place where the care seems absolutely AMAZING! Now, it's the process of getting into the birthing center I have found that I'm most interested in while I'm all the way across the country!!

I just got off of a phone appointment with one of the midwives (actually the one that founded the center) and am beyond impressed. She was already supporting me and walking me through the vitamins that I'm taking and giving suggestions on what might be better and WHY. She gave me suggestions for the heartburn that has been torturing me. 

I explained to the midwife I spoke to today that I'm looking for someone who is very clear in explaining what is happening with the pregnancy and any testing... after being sent with a paper to an address with no explanation even though I was obviously confused and had attempted to ask what it was for -- ONLY to find out I was having blood drawn & 6 vials at that. At which I STILL am not completely clear on WHAT they were testing for... I am pretty sure that this place will NOT be the same experience...

Now if I can just secure a spot in their birthing center! Tomorrow I'll be working on getting my paperwork in line to send out to secure my spot. Hope I'm not too late! Now I wish I'd have started this search back in February!

14 Weeks

Longer Days = Morning Sunrises Viewed From the Subway

The last few days have been feeling
on the cusp of summer.
Oooo how I long for the summer days
(maybe not hot hot hot summer heat -
not this summer)
but definitely summer days
(without work!)
9 and a half more weeks
(+ tomorrow...
But I am not counting it
cause it's Friday).

Dear 2nd Trimester

Dear 2nd Trimester,

Welcome!! Today is your first day.
I've been looking forward to you (counting down the days actually).
A few weeks ago, you seemed like ages away.
But today, you are here.

So where's that relief you are supposed to bring?
Because I still feel like I did in my 1st Trimester...
(maybe even worse - considering I've found myself kneeling at the toilet 3 times today!)
Maybe you are just slow, or maybe I'm just too excited for you to be here I haven't let you settle in.

So come in, unpack, please make yourself comfortable.
BUT more importantly... Please make ME comfortable!

xo,
Alicia

Feels and Looks like Spring

The weather is amazing here in NYC; it was even hot feeling yesterday. Last night, as the sun was going down, Seth and I headed to the park to enjoy it. Above are some photos of tulips - it might just be me, but I feel like there are WAY more tulips in NYC this spring than I ever remember in past springs...

Alan Visits

One of my brothers (Alan) drove up last weekend to bring us the car we'll be using to drive across the country this summer. He'll also be making the drive to Portland, because he's moving there later this summer as well! While he here, we got in most of the big sights. Here are a few photos from our city exploring.

We have 3 more sets of visitors coming - 2 have previously been to NYC but one hasn't (so we'll be doing all the sights again at least one more time before we move). Alan was a really easy tourist - we'd go see the sights and just keep going. He wasn't picky about what we saw and just kind of let me tour guide him around the city for 3 days. I do have to say though, I realized how SLOW I am now and how much energy I actually LACK! (Seth thinks it's awesome, because usually I'm asking him to SPEED up his walking. Now I'm asking him to SLOW down his walking!) After 3 days of exploring the city - the last 3 days of my break week have been spent being L.A.Z.Y! Making a baby is hard work!

The Newest Addition

Meet my niece Khloe Rae. She was born early early yesterday morning! A Thursday baby.

7 lbs. 9 oz. and 20 inches long. 

Oooo she is sooo adorable! That sweet little nose and those chubby little cheeks! I cannot wait to meet here (although it won't be until July! I will be counting down the days!) 

my next job begins in october

somewhere around october 17th - to be exact. 

there's our little lime. growing and growing each day. the little lime is about 6 cm long and moving up a storm (although its sweet little jolts and dance moves are happening without me feeling yet... if it is any indication to how active of a child we'll have, we'd say we'll have our hands full).

a zoom in of the profile. cannot wait to see this little one's profile in october and kiss that sweet nose!

and a last one of its sweet little leg and foot! 

we saw the baby and heard the heartbeat (161 beats per minute) for the first time yesterday. what an amazing and magical moment. 

13 weeks along. over half of which i have been sick for (miserably sick). i was beginning to become afraid that i had made it all up -- this "morning" sickness almost seems the norm for as long as it has lasted (and continues!) as it turns out, there really is a little one growing inside. and in the end,  these weeks/months of sickness will all be worth it. i hope this baby is so wonderful i forget all about being sick (it has to outweigh it - my brain has the repress the memory - or women would only have one child). 

the sun is beginning to set...

 ...on our time in new york city.

seth and i have made the big decision. 

everything has fallen into place. 

the end of june will be the end of our residency in nyc.

no longer new yorkers -

we've always known the day would come, 

but i don't think it will seem real until it is.

there are so many things in new york that i am ready to leave behind:

the 2 and a half hours i spend commuting each day to get to and from work

the crowds of people 

the trash

the polluted air (especially bothering me lately)

the honking cars

my small living space that i never truly made into a proper home 

(we feel like we have a college apartment - never wanting to commit to permanent furniture

in our temporary home here in nyc)

and there are so many things about new york that i'll miss:

the parks, beautiful parks - the way people flock to them because green space is so rare here

the subway (while we have a love/hate relationship, i will miss 'er)

the diversity (walking the streets you hear so many different languages... 

sitting in the museum yesterday, i realized i was in a room filled with so much diversity, so many different people)

the graffiti and art museums and all museums and inspiration in the most random places

the food

and i wonder what it is that i will take with me when i leave? 

and will i feel like i left my home? even though the home of my youth is the place i call home?

or will i be so ready for something new that i won't look back 

(like i did when i came to new york from kansas)

i know that i will cry. and be sad. and miss new york. 

or i assume i will. i cried when i moved to new york. it's the change. the standing on new ground.

all i have come to know will be completely different in a few short months.

i haven't really spent a lot of time thinking too deeply about it

because i am so excited for our new adventure to begin.

in a few short (i hope ;) months, seth and i will be heading west.

all the way west. 

to portland, oregon.

it'll be a new city, a new adventure. 

and the sun will set on new york, but rise on portland.
o i cannot wait!

city street

so many days have passed since i last posted. it seems as if i haven't been a blogger at all lately. i've actually cut my computer time way back. i'm only reading about 10 other blogs which update a couple times a week (so it's pretty easy to manage). i check facebook (maybe too much - & i don't even know why??) from my phone... and i definitely haven't been on pinterest (except i did try to get back on a couple times this week - i'll explain my absence from pinterest soon... well and maybe the reason i've been absent completely...)

this was a photo i took the other evening - another thing i haven't been doing. the last photos i took with my camera were months ago.

lots of updates to hopefully come soon, but for now this is a start. xo.